hmmm....
I do not know what is going on with my friend. Well, I guess I do, but I don't at the same time. There has been so much go on and then so much not go on at the same time lately. We haven't really talked in a long time. There is really nothing to say. Not really. The last we really talked about it, we didn't really talk about it. It was more like she texted me a message that said she was fine. Which she's not fine. Not at all. She tried to convince me of it, but she wasn't the One who showed me that she wasn't fine, so she isn't the One who can convince me that she is. She said she was doing "things" that I wouldn't approve of, but that she was "fine". I don't think so. It's not about me approving or not approving. It's not my place to approve or not approve. Everything comes down to a heart condition. Everything.
hmmm....
Monday, May 30, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
My other blog
I wrote a post there that I'll hijack and put here. I posted a link on Facebook to it and had an email that I responded to. I want to keep all of it, so will put it all here.
Here is the post from the other blog:
Here is the post from the other blog:
God's Sovereignty
This has been on my heart alot lately. I've been reading blogs that make statements over and over that they don't know why God allows this or that. This is a misunderstanding of God's sovereignty. Is God sovereign? Absolutely. Does mainstream Christianity misunderstand His sovereignty? Absolutely. It breaks my heart to hear God indirectly blamed for "allowing" things that happen to happen. He does not. It is not His will for a baby to die. It's not His will for bad things to happen. Tornadoes are not His will. Tsunamis are not His will. Things are not His will simply because they happen. It makes me so sad when people think that a person is put through horrible things so that they can learn something, or so that somebody else can learn something. Would you make something horrible happen to your child just so they could learn something? Absolutely not. God is no child abuser either.
Being sovereign means to have supreme rank or authority. Yes, God is sovereign. But being in supreme rank or authority does not mean that you are in control of everything. Does anything happen that God does not know happens? Absolutely not. He knows all. Just because He knows something happens does not mean He caused it by allowing it. Does it happen outside of His will? Lots of things do. The Bible clearly states that it is His will that none should perish, but all should be brought to repentance. We know this does not always happen, so in following this line of thinking - not all things that are God's will happen.
I used to struggle with this. And struggle. And stuggle. I was taught that because God is "sovereign", and nothing happens that He doesn't know, inadvertantly, His will is always played out. It is such a hard concept to grasp when most people are filled to overflowing with bad doctrine. I was there. I know how hard it is to renew your mind in mainstream churches.
We live in a fallen world. Some things just happen because of that. We also have an enemy who is here to steal, kill and destroy. Some things happen because of that. We live in ignorance. Some things happen because of that. We are responsible for so much more than we really know. We have authority over so much more than we understand.
When God placed man in the Garden, He gave man authority over the Earth. He never retracted that authority. God is sovereign, yes, but man has been given the authority to subdue the Earth. When man was deceived and sinned, he gave satan a right to some of that authority. When Jesus rose from the grave, He took back all authority in Heaven and Earth. When Jesus left the Earth, He gave that authority back to those who are in Him. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we are restored to our authority, but only in Christ.
Being sovereign means to have supreme rank or authority. Yes, God is sovereign. But being in supreme rank or authority does not mean that you are in control of everything. Does anything happen that God does not know happens? Absolutely not. He knows all. Just because He knows something happens does not mean He caused it by allowing it. Does it happen outside of His will? Lots of things do. The Bible clearly states that it is His will that none should perish, but all should be brought to repentance. We know this does not always happen, so in following this line of thinking - not all things that are God's will happen.
I used to struggle with this. And struggle. And stuggle. I was taught that because God is "sovereign", and nothing happens that He doesn't know, inadvertantly, His will is always played out. It is such a hard concept to grasp when most people are filled to overflowing with bad doctrine. I was there. I know how hard it is to renew your mind in mainstream churches.
We live in a fallen world. Some things just happen because of that. We also have an enemy who is here to steal, kill and destroy. Some things happen because of that. We live in ignorance. Some things happen because of that. We are responsible for so much more than we really know. We have authority over so much more than we understand.
When God placed man in the Garden, He gave man authority over the Earth. He never retracted that authority. God is sovereign, yes, but man has been given the authority to subdue the Earth. When man was deceived and sinned, he gave satan a right to some of that authority. When Jesus rose from the grave, He took back all authority in Heaven and Earth. When Jesus left the Earth, He gave that authority back to those who are in Him. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we are restored to our authority, but only in Christ.
Here is the email that was sent questioning:
Your blog
Katie, I just read your blog. You worded it well. I just have a few questiond for you? What verses in the Bible did you see that determined your thoughts?
Consider this verse, God has absolute rule over creation as King and total control and determination over all that happens.
“His dominion is an everlasting dominion, and his kingdom endures from generation to generation; all the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, and he does according to his will among the host of heaven and among the inhabitants of the earth; and none can stay his hand or say to him, ‘What have you done?’” (Dan. 4:34–35) Also look into these verses, 1 Kings 12:15; 1 Chron. 29:11–13; Ps. 22:28; 24:1; 47:7–9; 103:19; Prov. 16:19, 21, 33; Dan. 4:25; 7:1–28; 12:1–13; Matt. 6:13; 10:29; Acts 17:26; Eph. 1:11; 1 Tim. 6:15; James 1:13–15.
Keep digging into the Word Katie. Keep up the good work!
Kevin
Consider this verse, God has absolute rule over creation as King and total control and determination over all that happens.
“His dominion is an everlasting dominion, and his kingdom endures from generation to generation; all the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, and he does according to his will among the host of heaven and among the inhabitants of the earth; and none can stay his hand or say to him, ‘What have you done?’” (Dan. 4:34–35) Also look into these verses, 1 Kings 12:15; 1 Chron. 29:11–13; Ps. 22:28; 24:1; 47:7–9; 103:19; Prov. 16:19, 21, 33; Dan. 4:25; 7:1–28; 12:1–13; Matt. 6:13; 10:29; Acts 17:26; Eph. 1:11; 1 Tim. 6:15; James 1:13–15.
Keep digging into the Word Katie. Keep up the good work!
Kevin
Here is my response email:
Hey, Kevin!
How are you guys? I haven't gotten to talk to Mary in forever. I just see FB updates and such. Your girls are beautiful, as always.
I'm not avoiding your question, I just don't have time right now to dig everything out and go verse by verse. Something to think about, though...and I'm not the most articulate, but I'm trying.
Please see my heart, we are brethren. We agree on the most important doctrine, and that is Jesus - who He is, why He came and the circumstances around that. Everything else is up for discussion, but not Jesus. Because of Him, we can discuss, as family, things like this. :-)
When we read scripture, it is imperative to consider who wrote it, under what circumstances, and when. Many men in the Old Testament, when writing the books, did not have the amount of revelation that we can have now through the Holy Spirit. You can actually see, through time, that the amount of revelation grew progressively. Job did not have near the revelation that David did. Both spoke of God's nature, but neither could have the grasp that you or I can have through the Holy Spirit. The writers of the Old Testament's personalities came through in their writings, just like ours do. We, of course, have seen the full revelation of who God is in Jesus. He, Himself said that He only did what He saw the Father do. We can go straight to Him to see the TRUE nature of God.
Please, please, please don't think I'm downing or disrespecting the Old Testament. I'm certainly not! All scripture is given to us for learning and reproof. We are to learn from it all. Every bit of it is holy and God-breathed, but not every single bit of it describes God's nature.
I grew up thinking that when somebody became sick, say with cancer or something and God didn't heal them, that it must have been God's will for that person to have cancer. This is so very wrong. It's the same with natural disasters. I always thought that ultimately they were God's judgement or will for them to happen because if they weren't, why didn't he stop them? I thought everything that happened was His will simply by process of elmination. He must have wanted it or He would have stopped it and it wouldn't have happened. This is also wrong.
When we look to the example of Jesus - we can see that God does not allow sickness on anybody. Jesus healed all who He came into contact with, with the exception of those who had unbelief (as in the examples of people in His hometown where He could not - and that's a key - He could not - it was His will to heal, but He could not because of their unbelief). There is not one case recorded of Jesus ever putting any sickness or disease on anybody. So why would I ever think it's God's will for somebody to be sick in any instance? Just because it happens, doesn't mean it's God's will. Looking at Jesus and His life and what's recorded in the Gospels as to why He couldn't heal some people (their unbelief) - it would require us to ask why all can't be healed today if it's God's will for all to be. Unbelief. Which opens a new can of worm...
What about the people who we know have faith? Why aren't they healed if it's God's will to heal all and all aren't? When Jesus came down from the mount of transfiguration, He was brought the man with the boy who the disciples couldn't heal. He didn't deal directly with the boy immediately. He dealt with the boy's father. It was their unbelief that was cited as the problem. The man said that he believed, but he needed Jesus to help his unbelief. Jesus didn't correct him and tell him that he couldn't have belief and unbelief at the same time. Faith and unbelief are two separate things and they can exist in the same person at the same time.
It's like having a cart that you are trying to get somewhere. The cart is the healing in this case. You can have a horse (faith) tied to one side and if you get him to pull it, the cart will move. But if you hook another horse to the directly opposite side of the cart (unbelief) and have both pulling at the same time, your cart's going nowhere. Jesus told him that this kind came out by prayer and fasting. Jesus was talking about the unbelief coming out, not the demon. There is not a demon out there who is not subject to Jesus' name. His name is higher than all. He couldn't have been talking about the demon coming out by prayer and fasting. The only thing that's affected by prayer and fasting is our sensitivity to God. When Jesus was saying to fast and pray, He was saying to starve our unbelief. He was giving them a tool to tip the scales toward the side of belief.
I had a very hard time with this because it seems that it puts so much responsability on us. It does. Jesus never sugar-coated things to His disciples. He rebuked them for their unbelief so many times. He made a big deal about it. When He left, He left them with instructions to make disciples. He empowered them with the Holy Spirit. He said it would be better that He went to the Father. He gave us the tools to overcome the unbelief and do the works that He did, and greater. He gave us the authority to do everything He did - heal the sick, raise the dead, give sight to the blind, set the captives free. Everything. And it is our responsability.
I don't understand it all for sure. I am growing every day in revelation of the nature of God and my relationship with Him. I hope you can see my heart in typing all of this out. I know it's not all-inclusive and it doesn't even scratch the surface of all that I want to be able to say to explain.
As for the natural disasters. I mentioned before that I always thought of these as judgment and ultimately God's will. That's not true either. God poured out all His wrath on Jesus for ALL sins - past, present and future. He's not up there passing judgment anymore at all. God doesn't even get in a bad mood anymore. Hebrews says that Jesus was the propitiation for all sin for all time. He sat down at the right hand of the Father because it was ALL paid for. He paid for ALL the sins of the world - even the ones that the people don't repent over. The only sin at all that sends anybody to hell is not accepting Christ. Every other sin (even of the unbeliever) is paid for. So, He cannot send natural disasters as judgment without saying to Jesus that Jesus didn't do enough.
There are so many things that happen in this world just because it's a fallen place. It has degenerated since the fall of man, and at a steady pace. I believe we'll see an acceleration of these as we approach the end times as we are living in the last days.
I hope that gives you something to think about.
Love you guys,
Katie
How are you guys? I haven't gotten to talk to Mary in forever. I just see FB updates and such. Your girls are beautiful, as always.
I'm not avoiding your question, I just don't have time right now to dig everything out and go verse by verse. Something to think about, though...and I'm not the most articulate, but I'm trying.
Please see my heart, we are brethren. We agree on the most important doctrine, and that is Jesus - who He is, why He came and the circumstances around that. Everything else is up for discussion, but not Jesus. Because of Him, we can discuss, as family, things like this. :-)
When we read scripture, it is imperative to consider who wrote it, under what circumstances, and when. Many men in the Old Testament, when writing the books, did not have the amount of revelation that we can have now through the Holy Spirit. You can actually see, through time, that the amount of revelation grew progressively. Job did not have near the revelation that David did. Both spoke of God's nature, but neither could have the grasp that you or I can have through the Holy Spirit. The writers of the Old Testament's personalities came through in their writings, just like ours do. We, of course, have seen the full revelation of who God is in Jesus. He, Himself said that He only did what He saw the Father do. We can go straight to Him to see the TRUE nature of God.
Please, please, please don't think I'm downing or disrespecting the Old Testament. I'm certainly not! All scripture is given to us for learning and reproof. We are to learn from it all. Every bit of it is holy and God-breathed, but not every single bit of it describes God's nature.
I grew up thinking that when somebody became sick, say with cancer or something and God didn't heal them, that it must have been God's will for that person to have cancer. This is so very wrong. It's the same with natural disasters. I always thought that ultimately they were God's judgement or will for them to happen because if they weren't, why didn't he stop them? I thought everything that happened was His will simply by process of elmination. He must have wanted it or He would have stopped it and it wouldn't have happened. This is also wrong.
When we look to the example of Jesus - we can see that God does not allow sickness on anybody. Jesus healed all who He came into contact with, with the exception of those who had unbelief (as in the examples of people in His hometown where He could not - and that's a key - He could not - it was His will to heal, but He could not because of their unbelief). There is not one case recorded of Jesus ever putting any sickness or disease on anybody. So why would I ever think it's God's will for somebody to be sick in any instance? Just because it happens, doesn't mean it's God's will. Looking at Jesus and His life and what's recorded in the Gospels as to why He couldn't heal some people (their unbelief) - it would require us to ask why all can't be healed today if it's God's will for all to be. Unbelief. Which opens a new can of worm...
What about the people who we know have faith? Why aren't they healed if it's God's will to heal all and all aren't? When Jesus came down from the mount of transfiguration, He was brought the man with the boy who the disciples couldn't heal. He didn't deal directly with the boy immediately. He dealt with the boy's father. It was their unbelief that was cited as the problem. The man said that he believed, but he needed Jesus to help his unbelief. Jesus didn't correct him and tell him that he couldn't have belief and unbelief at the same time. Faith and unbelief are two separate things and they can exist in the same person at the same time.
It's like having a cart that you are trying to get somewhere. The cart is the healing in this case. You can have a horse (faith) tied to one side and if you get him to pull it, the cart will move. But if you hook another horse to the directly opposite side of the cart (unbelief) and have both pulling at the same time, your cart's going nowhere. Jesus told him that this kind came out by prayer and fasting. Jesus was talking about the unbelief coming out, not the demon. There is not a demon out there who is not subject to Jesus' name. His name is higher than all. He couldn't have been talking about the demon coming out by prayer and fasting. The only thing that's affected by prayer and fasting is our sensitivity to God. When Jesus was saying to fast and pray, He was saying to starve our unbelief. He was giving them a tool to tip the scales toward the side of belief.
I had a very hard time with this because it seems that it puts so much responsability on us. It does. Jesus never sugar-coated things to His disciples. He rebuked them for their unbelief so many times. He made a big deal about it. When He left, He left them with instructions to make disciples. He empowered them with the Holy Spirit. He said it would be better that He went to the Father. He gave us the tools to overcome the unbelief and do the works that He did, and greater. He gave us the authority to do everything He did - heal the sick, raise the dead, give sight to the blind, set the captives free. Everything. And it is our responsability.
I don't understand it all for sure. I am growing every day in revelation of the nature of God and my relationship with Him. I hope you can see my heart in typing all of this out. I know it's not all-inclusive and it doesn't even scratch the surface of all that I want to be able to say to explain.
As for the natural disasters. I mentioned before that I always thought of these as judgment and ultimately God's will. That's not true either. God poured out all His wrath on Jesus for ALL sins - past, present and future. He's not up there passing judgment anymore at all. God doesn't even get in a bad mood anymore. Hebrews says that Jesus was the propitiation for all sin for all time. He sat down at the right hand of the Father because it was ALL paid for. He paid for ALL the sins of the world - even the ones that the people don't repent over. The only sin at all that sends anybody to hell is not accepting Christ. Every other sin (even of the unbeliever) is paid for. So, He cannot send natural disasters as judgment without saying to Jesus that Jesus didn't do enough.
There are so many things that happen in this world just because it's a fallen place. It has degenerated since the fall of man, and at a steady pace. I believe we'll see an acceleration of these as we approach the end times as we are living in the last days.
I hope that gives you something to think about.
Love you guys,
Katie
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
It's been a while...
All is not always roses and sunshine at Bible School. Maybe that should have been my title. I'm not being a downer at all about it. It's definitely up there as one of the most wonderful experiences of my life - and I'm not even a third of the way done yet! I guess the point is simply that with everything, there is a price. With every revelation of the Word that is given, it is tested and that testing is tough sometimes. And sometimes, people do things you don't understand. But each test and situation is a learning experience and a life lesson.
One of the reasons I've kinda' avoided blogging here is Sandra. I haven't felt the freedom to write openly about things because I gave her the blog a couple of months ago and don't know if she still does or ever read it. I don't feel good about airing anything out here, but it's just enough to say that she left school without an explanation to me, which I didn't understand, but that was her choice. I also learned the lesson of keeping this place private to me so that it can (in every other area) still be a place to honestly an openly journal my experience. It's rather a shame because there are so many life lessons that I learned through that experience that would be of value to have chronicled.
David got a job at Target. He loves it and I'm so very happy for him. He's cashiering and has said that it's really good for him because he is having to learn how to make small-talk. He is an amazing husband and father and I don't know where in the world I'd be without him!
Dena is living 15 minutes from me now. That's so exciting! This is the closest proximity we've been to each other in years and it's fantastic! I love her and her girls so very much.
I spent Spring Break in Missouri with my grandparents. Just me and Josh and them. It was sooo nice. I took Joshua to a circus in West Plains and we both loved it so much! He is such a good kid.
The Saturday that I drove up there, we had a women's brunch/meeting at church. When I heard it advertised, the Holy Spirit told me that I need to be there. Ok. Those get-togethers are usually not really my thing, but He's been working with me on that because I do love the women. I think my problem is really not the get-together, it's more that I don't like the drama that I usually associate with a women's group. I'm beginning to realize that this group is pretty low-key on the drama. It is there, yes, but not like your typical group. He's awakening a desire and love for the women of our church in me. I think something's going on there...
Anyway, one of the speakers was the director from the crisis pregnancy center in Sherman. When I figured this out, the Holy Spirit said that this was why I was there. During a break, I was browsing the table that she had set up. She happened to be right there, and we chatted a bit. She told me she was looking for somebody to lead the Forgiven and Set Free Bible study that they offer. I got excited about that and started thinking about it. I told her I'd been through it and was set free.
She did her talk and while she was talking, I was praying for the Lord to show me if this was truly for me or simply an emotional response. He told me that His gifts and callings are without repentance and that He had called me to that already. I spoke to her again and filled out the info she needed. I told her I'd be out of town for a week and would call her when I was back. I did call, but left a message since she was out of town the following week. Funny.
Anyway, in the meantime, it popped in my head that Dena really should probably go through the study. Just after that, Dena and I were chatting for a minute and I told her that I might be doing that study through the center and she said that she wanted me to do it with her. How awesome is it when the Holy Spirit confirms what He's told you through another person.
We started the study Saturday night. And now, Tracey wants to come join it. I am so excited for them. I'm not excited for the difficulties they have coming, but where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom! I'm excited to witness their coming into that freedom!
What a mighty God we serve! What a mighty God we serve! Angels bow before Him, Heaven and Earth adore Him. What a mighty God we serve!
One of the reasons I've kinda' avoided blogging here is Sandra. I haven't felt the freedom to write openly about things because I gave her the blog a couple of months ago and don't know if she still does or ever read it. I don't feel good about airing anything out here, but it's just enough to say that she left school without an explanation to me, which I didn't understand, but that was her choice. I also learned the lesson of keeping this place private to me so that it can (in every other area) still be a place to honestly an openly journal my experience. It's rather a shame because there are so many life lessons that I learned through that experience that would be of value to have chronicled.
David got a job at Target. He loves it and I'm so very happy for him. He's cashiering and has said that it's really good for him because he is having to learn how to make small-talk. He is an amazing husband and father and I don't know where in the world I'd be without him!
Dena is living 15 minutes from me now. That's so exciting! This is the closest proximity we've been to each other in years and it's fantastic! I love her and her girls so very much.
I spent Spring Break in Missouri with my grandparents. Just me and Josh and them. It was sooo nice. I took Joshua to a circus in West Plains and we both loved it so much! He is such a good kid.
The Saturday that I drove up there, we had a women's brunch/meeting at church. When I heard it advertised, the Holy Spirit told me that I need to be there. Ok. Those get-togethers are usually not really my thing, but He's been working with me on that because I do love the women. I think my problem is really not the get-together, it's more that I don't like the drama that I usually associate with a women's group. I'm beginning to realize that this group is pretty low-key on the drama. It is there, yes, but not like your typical group. He's awakening a desire and love for the women of our church in me. I think something's going on there...
Anyway, one of the speakers was the director from the crisis pregnancy center in Sherman. When I figured this out, the Holy Spirit said that this was why I was there. During a break, I was browsing the table that she had set up. She happened to be right there, and we chatted a bit. She told me she was looking for somebody to lead the Forgiven and Set Free Bible study that they offer. I got excited about that and started thinking about it. I told her I'd been through it and was set free.
She did her talk and while she was talking, I was praying for the Lord to show me if this was truly for me or simply an emotional response. He told me that His gifts and callings are without repentance and that He had called me to that already. I spoke to her again and filled out the info she needed. I told her I'd be out of town for a week and would call her when I was back. I did call, but left a message since she was out of town the following week. Funny.
Anyway, in the meantime, it popped in my head that Dena really should probably go through the study. Just after that, Dena and I were chatting for a minute and I told her that I might be doing that study through the center and she said that she wanted me to do it with her. How awesome is it when the Holy Spirit confirms what He's told you through another person.
We started the study Saturday night. And now, Tracey wants to come join it. I am so excited for them. I'm not excited for the difficulties they have coming, but where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom! I'm excited to witness their coming into that freedom!
What a mighty God we serve! What a mighty God we serve! Angels bow before Him, Heaven and Earth adore Him. What a mighty God we serve!
Friday, February 25, 2011
another awesome night at CBC
Last night, I went to night classes because my friend Lisa was going with me. It was a really great experience for us both.
I have only been to night school twice before last night. Once on a part-timer's night and once not. On the nights the part-timers are there (Tues and Thurs), it's a pretty full room. On the other nights, there's only one first year.
I was the only one who hadn't done my Relationship with God talk, so I did. I felt so silly and self-conscious. It was awful. I knew I had heard from God on the subject, but just felt like I fumbled over every word and stuttered. I was miserable while talking.
After I sat down and I'm sure turned bright red, a girl behind me said that the Lord used something I talked about to set her free. Oh, how that changed everything. I felt so silly for being self-conscious. I should never be! I should only be God-conscious and no matter how it comes out, if I'm surrendered to Him, it will be the Word somebody needs for that moment. So what if I stutter a little bit? So what if I don't know that group? So what if whatever?
It is so selfish to be so worried about how my speeches come out. I had an awesome one on Wednesday, and felt like that one just didn't measure up. I am learning (praise God) that shyness is also pride. Pride is simply esteeming my own opinion of myself more highly than God's. Who am I to be shy and worried about how I look when God told me that He would give me the Word to speak? Who am I to esteem my opinion of myself more highly than God's opinion of me? That's pride just as much as if I were to think I was better than everybody else.
Oh, what you learn at Bible School!
I have only been to night school twice before last night. Once on a part-timer's night and once not. On the nights the part-timers are there (Tues and Thurs), it's a pretty full room. On the other nights, there's only one first year.
I was the only one who hadn't done my Relationship with God talk, so I did. I felt so silly and self-conscious. It was awful. I knew I had heard from God on the subject, but just felt like I fumbled over every word and stuttered. I was miserable while talking.
After I sat down and I'm sure turned bright red, a girl behind me said that the Lord used something I talked about to set her free. Oh, how that changed everything. I felt so silly for being self-conscious. I should never be! I should only be God-conscious and no matter how it comes out, if I'm surrendered to Him, it will be the Word somebody needs for that moment. So what if I stutter a little bit? So what if I don't know that group? So what if whatever?
It is so selfish to be so worried about how my speeches come out. I had an awesome one on Wednesday, and felt like that one just didn't measure up. I am learning (praise God) that shyness is also pride. Pride is simply esteeming my own opinion of myself more highly than God's. Who am I to be shy and worried about how I look when God told me that He would give me the Word to speak? Who am I to esteem my opinion of myself more highly than God's opinion of me? That's pride just as much as if I were to think I was better than everybody else.
Oh, what you learn at Bible School!
Thursday, February 24, 2011
My heart is so full!
Yesterday was an amazing morning at school! I don't know if I can get it all on here, but I'll never forget it!
On the drive in, I was just compelled by the Holy Spirit to just pray and praise the Lord. It was a wonderful trip in.
We started off with praise and worship. We hadn't had any in a while because we were behind on our scheduled classes since we'd missed four ice days. It was really awesome! Everybody was in one accord and the Spirit was manifested so clearly. There's really no way to describe it! He loves us sooo much! Goose got a message and interpretation from the Lord. He just told us He loves us sooo much and that He would be more and more reality to us each day. I'm so excited!
We spent some time in the Word after worship and just like always, the Lord gave me my 5 minute talk subject during that time. He has shown me and continues to show me that He will give me exactly what I need, right when I need it. He is always on time and always just enough. He is my Provider on every level - not just physical and emotional things, but every level. He provides the air I need to breathe just when I need to breathe it. He provides the money we need just when we need it. And He provides the Word I need, just when I need it. He provides!
Our talks were sooo good! We had several before break and the rest after. When Janis spoke, I saw in my spirit, a huge bird of prey - one I don't think I've seen before. It looked like either a hawk or an eagle, but was all white - pure white and gorgeous. I knew instantly that this bird symbolized the Father. He was regal and majestic looking. His eyes were amazing - they saw and took in everything. Beautiful. Then I saw that I am enfolded in His wing. When I hear scripture about being under the wing (can't think of an exact reference) before, I had pictured an extended wing and just simply being covered. But this was different. I was literally enfolded under His wing - not to sound yucky or anything, but in the armpit (haha) of the bird. Where as He stood there with His wings at rest at His side, you couldn't even see me. I felt the enfolding around me. I could feel the pulse of the bird and the warmth of the feathers - soft and downy in that vulnerable place on the bird. It was so amazing and beautiful. I could smell a sweet, wild fragrance. I can feel it again just in remembering right now. I could feel the muscles and the soft tissues. It was soft, warm and safe, but so, so strong.
Matthew spoke on loving man and not fearing him at all. Rick spoke on where our thoughts come from. Chima spoke on Psalms 91 and 23. Alan spoke on Proverbs and wisdom - he said the Lord had shown him a chapter where he could replace Vicky's name with Wisdom's to show what Vicky is to him in a picture from the Lord of his marriage. It was beautiful! James spoke of a vision he had the night before. He saw the Heavens open up and Jesus in the air. Then he saw what looked like shooting stars, shooting up to Jesus and the Lord showed him that it was the Rapture. He then saw darkness on the Earth and understood that it was because the Holy Spirit was taken out with the people. He said then that the Joy of the Lord overtook him right there in his bed and he spent some time just laughing deep belly laughs in the Lord's presence. He said that he was almost surprised that he didn't get overcome again because his Joy was so full. James also said that the Lord has shown him that we are going to be seeing manifestations of the Spirit in the part of the body that we are there at school. They are going to be very common and normal for us. Carolyn spoke on Proverbs. Kenny spoke on Jeremiah. At one point Kenny was so overcome by Love that he broke down in tears. Beautiful. Ruth spoke on Proverbs. Janis spoke of a vision the Lord had given her. She said she heard Him say clearly, "Speak my Word". She said she then saw an index card with the word "REALITY" on it, printed in black. She said she asked the Lord what this meant and He brought her to some scripture that showed her to interpret what He was saying to mean that she was to make the spoken Word her reality. Wow! The scripture was in Proverbs and it made a reference to a certain kind of tree that I can't remember right off. Janis had done a study on that tree and had found that it bloomed in late winter. She said she was symbolized by the tree - blooming late.
When I was preparing for my speech, I was looking through the Old Testament Survey IV notes that I had and the notes on Ecclesiastes just jumped off the page. He told me that was my speech. I kinda' argued with Him because I said that there were no scripture references. He said that was His Word for that time for that body and I needed to just trust Him and give it. Ok. I did. I spoke about the blessings He's manifested in our lives since school started. It was really good. I love the feeling I get when I know that the Lord is the one speaking out through me. It's amazing and I'm seeing it more and more. I am seeing it in conversations with other people and at school. I'm seeing fruits of the Spirit in my life, and I'm enjoying the work He does in me. There are prices to pay, make no mistake, and sometimes the emotions involved in those prices are difficult at best, but I'm so in love with the Lord that the cost is nothing in comparison.
Last to speak was Andrew. He spoke on us being the body and that we would be seeing manifestations of the Spirit, just like James said. He talked for a few minutes on some things the Lord has shown him about the people of the Lord being lights and shining brighter and brighter. He said when he sees each of us in the Spirit, he sees so much more than our flesh. He then went person to person and gave a word of exhortation over each one! He said Chima had great things in store for him. He said Janis was under the shadow of the wing of the Most High (my vision while she was speaking!). Matthew was Joy and jumping for Joy for the Lord. I don't remember Rick and Terry. James is a pillar. Ruth is the support of the pillar. Kenny was like a child and full of love for the Lord. Carolyn is a voice of praise. Kevin would love the unlovable and reach the unreachable. I am a blessing and blessed to be a blessing. I can't remember Julie. Alan is Wisdom and has Wisdom at his right hand (Vicky!). It was absolutely AMAZING! I can't wait for more.
Oh, when Kevin was speaking, I saw a vision of him and David standing shoulder to shoulder (touching shoulders) in equality. I am not sure exactly what it meant, but I believe that David and Kevin are linked together for something very important. After class, I told Kevin that we have our Bible study on Tuesdays and that I'd love for him and his wife to come. I'd love to get to know his wife! At that moment, I had a desire for nothing but getting to know her.
When I sat down, Kevin had tears in his eyes and told me that my message was for him. He told me a couple of times that it is for him. I have a feeling that there is something pretty significant that he and his wife are going through that we have a revelation on. I can't wait to get to know them!
On the way home, Sandra called to ask how class went. I told her everything I could remember and that I really just knew that the Spirit would do something amazing in the night classes also. I just knew it and He did. David and Sandra both went to night school last night. He came home bubbling over about the talks that they had and how awesome it was. He said that the last girl to speak spoke on "diverse tongues". I have never really thought much about what Paul said when he said he spoke with "diverse tongues". I'll have to get more into that when I receive a revelation of my own about it.
I can't wait to talk to Sandra!
On the drive in, I was just compelled by the Holy Spirit to just pray and praise the Lord. It was a wonderful trip in.
We started off with praise and worship. We hadn't had any in a while because we were behind on our scheduled classes since we'd missed four ice days. It was really awesome! Everybody was in one accord and the Spirit was manifested so clearly. There's really no way to describe it! He loves us sooo much! Goose got a message and interpretation from the Lord. He just told us He loves us sooo much and that He would be more and more reality to us each day. I'm so excited!
We spent some time in the Word after worship and just like always, the Lord gave me my 5 minute talk subject during that time. He has shown me and continues to show me that He will give me exactly what I need, right when I need it. He is always on time and always just enough. He is my Provider on every level - not just physical and emotional things, but every level. He provides the air I need to breathe just when I need to breathe it. He provides the money we need just when we need it. And He provides the Word I need, just when I need it. He provides!
Our talks were sooo good! We had several before break and the rest after. When Janis spoke, I saw in my spirit, a huge bird of prey - one I don't think I've seen before. It looked like either a hawk or an eagle, but was all white - pure white and gorgeous. I knew instantly that this bird symbolized the Father. He was regal and majestic looking. His eyes were amazing - they saw and took in everything. Beautiful. Then I saw that I am enfolded in His wing. When I hear scripture about being under the wing (can't think of an exact reference) before, I had pictured an extended wing and just simply being covered. But this was different. I was literally enfolded under His wing - not to sound yucky or anything, but in the armpit (haha) of the bird. Where as He stood there with His wings at rest at His side, you couldn't even see me. I felt the enfolding around me. I could feel the pulse of the bird and the warmth of the feathers - soft and downy in that vulnerable place on the bird. It was so amazing and beautiful. I could smell a sweet, wild fragrance. I can feel it again just in remembering right now. I could feel the muscles and the soft tissues. It was soft, warm and safe, but so, so strong.
Matthew spoke on loving man and not fearing him at all. Rick spoke on where our thoughts come from. Chima spoke on Psalms 91 and 23. Alan spoke on Proverbs and wisdom - he said the Lord had shown him a chapter where he could replace Vicky's name with Wisdom's to show what Vicky is to him in a picture from the Lord of his marriage. It was beautiful! James spoke of a vision he had the night before. He saw the Heavens open up and Jesus in the air. Then he saw what looked like shooting stars, shooting up to Jesus and the Lord showed him that it was the Rapture. He then saw darkness on the Earth and understood that it was because the Holy Spirit was taken out with the people. He said then that the Joy of the Lord overtook him right there in his bed and he spent some time just laughing deep belly laughs in the Lord's presence. He said that he was almost surprised that he didn't get overcome again because his Joy was so full. James also said that the Lord has shown him that we are going to be seeing manifestations of the Spirit in the part of the body that we are there at school. They are going to be very common and normal for us. Carolyn spoke on Proverbs. Kenny spoke on Jeremiah. At one point Kenny was so overcome by Love that he broke down in tears. Beautiful. Ruth spoke on Proverbs. Janis spoke of a vision the Lord had given her. She said she heard Him say clearly, "Speak my Word". She said she then saw an index card with the word "REALITY" on it, printed in black. She said she asked the Lord what this meant and He brought her to some scripture that showed her to interpret what He was saying to mean that she was to make the spoken Word her reality. Wow! The scripture was in Proverbs and it made a reference to a certain kind of tree that I can't remember right off. Janis had done a study on that tree and had found that it bloomed in late winter. She said she was symbolized by the tree - blooming late.
When I was preparing for my speech, I was looking through the Old Testament Survey IV notes that I had and the notes on Ecclesiastes just jumped off the page. He told me that was my speech. I kinda' argued with Him because I said that there were no scripture references. He said that was His Word for that time for that body and I needed to just trust Him and give it. Ok. I did. I spoke about the blessings He's manifested in our lives since school started. It was really good. I love the feeling I get when I know that the Lord is the one speaking out through me. It's amazing and I'm seeing it more and more. I am seeing it in conversations with other people and at school. I'm seeing fruits of the Spirit in my life, and I'm enjoying the work He does in me. There are prices to pay, make no mistake, and sometimes the emotions involved in those prices are difficult at best, but I'm so in love with the Lord that the cost is nothing in comparison.
Last to speak was Andrew. He spoke on us being the body and that we would be seeing manifestations of the Spirit, just like James said. He talked for a few minutes on some things the Lord has shown him about the people of the Lord being lights and shining brighter and brighter. He said when he sees each of us in the Spirit, he sees so much more than our flesh. He then went person to person and gave a word of exhortation over each one! He said Chima had great things in store for him. He said Janis was under the shadow of the wing of the Most High (my vision while she was speaking!). Matthew was Joy and jumping for Joy for the Lord. I don't remember Rick and Terry. James is a pillar. Ruth is the support of the pillar. Kenny was like a child and full of love for the Lord. Carolyn is a voice of praise. Kevin would love the unlovable and reach the unreachable. I am a blessing and blessed to be a blessing. I can't remember Julie. Alan is Wisdom and has Wisdom at his right hand (Vicky!). It was absolutely AMAZING! I can't wait for more.
Oh, when Kevin was speaking, I saw a vision of him and David standing shoulder to shoulder (touching shoulders) in equality. I am not sure exactly what it meant, but I believe that David and Kevin are linked together for something very important. After class, I told Kevin that we have our Bible study on Tuesdays and that I'd love for him and his wife to come. I'd love to get to know his wife! At that moment, I had a desire for nothing but getting to know her.
When I sat down, Kevin had tears in his eyes and told me that my message was for him. He told me a couple of times that it is for him. I have a feeling that there is something pretty significant that he and his wife are going through that we have a revelation on. I can't wait to get to know them!
On the way home, Sandra called to ask how class went. I told her everything I could remember and that I really just knew that the Spirit would do something amazing in the night classes also. I just knew it and He did. David and Sandra both went to night school last night. He came home bubbling over about the talks that they had and how awesome it was. He said that the last girl to speak spoke on "diverse tongues". I have never really thought much about what Paul said when he said he spoke with "diverse tongues". I'll have to get more into that when I receive a revelation of my own about it.
I can't wait to talk to Sandra!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Renewing my mind
God is renewing my mind to food! I had considered it before, but He really is. I saw it very clearly yesterday at Aldi.
When I shop now, I read everything. I put so many things back because they were so unhealthy - so many things that I've been buying for my family for a long time.
I think I'm about to end up at the Whole Foods Market for quite a few things. We are going to be moving away from alot of dairy products. We won't be consuming near the gluten we were.
I'm simply amazed.
I don't even know what week I'm on with this diet, but it's not really a diet anymore for me. It's now a way of life. It was the right time for me to be doing this.
This doesn't mean that my kids won't get to have pizza or ice cream from time to time, but they will definitely be the treats they are supposed to be and not the norm!
When I shop now, I read everything. I put so many things back because they were so unhealthy - so many things that I've been buying for my family for a long time.
I think I'm about to end up at the Whole Foods Market for quite a few things. We are going to be moving away from alot of dairy products. We won't be consuming near the gluten we were.
I'm simply amazed.
I don't even know what week I'm on with this diet, but it's not really a diet anymore for me. It's now a way of life. It was the right time for me to be doing this.
This doesn't mean that my kids won't get to have pizza or ice cream from time to time, but they will definitely be the treats they are supposed to be and not the norm!
Monday, January 31, 2011
God showed me some stuff.
*** I am not a husband basher - I adore my husband, but like anybody, we have times where we have to work through some things. These things do not in any way reduce the amount of admiration and love I have for him. They are just that, things we have to work through. And they make us stronger. David is a wonderful, godly husband and father and I could not ask for a better man. ***
I believe He was able to show me more because of the increased sensitivity because of my fast.
I was praying about mine and David's situation the other day. (It's all blown over and we're just fine now.) The Lord showed me that David had taken some traits that I have had over the years and made them into me. Meaning, he had made me those things instead of seeing them as just traits that I have and things I have to deal with.
I know there is truth to me being critical. I don't deny it and am working with the Lord on finding the root of that to get it removed. I am in no way minimizing it. I am starting to see that some of it comes from envy and jealousy. We are taking a class on envy and jealousy right now, and alot of it is ringing with me. But, I do believe that David had taken some thoughts, pondered them, and turned them into emotions. He had seen anything and everything that I have said recently as being critical, whether it was or wasn't. The times I was truly critical, he used to enforce his belief that I am just critical all the time. It had grown with him until he just blew his top when I pushed on him to see what was going on.
I can almost visualize it. I believe that the Lord would have shown me the truth of the situation without the fast, but with it, He was able to truly show me the depth of it all. Also, I was able to temper my frustration about it more quickly because He showed me so quickly how it all came about. My flesh was already being fasted into submission, so anger and frustration were easy to simmer down.
After that incident, he was really lovey-dovey toward me and wanted to snuggle and cuddle all the time. He is an affectionate person, but he was being much more affectionate than ever normal. He was doing this because he had just had an emotional release and then felt better and actually more affectionate toward me.
We sat down and talked about everything and I told him some of what the Lord had shown me. (All of it isn't here, of course - some is too private. And some was just for my understanding and not to share with him.) Everything is really good now. Really good, I might add. I love my husband so much!
On a totally different note...
I took a cashier's check by to reinstate our mortgage loan and catch it up to date!!! Wow! God is awesome!
In the lobby of the attorney's office, I sat down next to a couple who started chatting with me. They were there to do the same thing. The gentleman asked me how everything was going and if we were going to be able to save our house. I felt prompted to tell him a bit of our story, so did. He listened quite intently - I'm not sure what was going on in his head - and then told me that he and his wife certainly did believe in the power of prayer. I told him that I believe in the power of prayer, and it's so awesome to see the supernatural power of the Lord working in our lives. That's when he told me they were Jehovah's Witnesses! I don't know all of what they believe, but I don't think it leaves much room for the Lord to supernaturally move in a stay-at-home mom turned Bible college student's life. I know that some seeds were planted. And also, all along, there was another guy listening to our conversation. I love it when God moves.
I believe He was able to show me more because of the increased sensitivity because of my fast.
I was praying about mine and David's situation the other day. (It's all blown over and we're just fine now.) The Lord showed me that David had taken some traits that I have had over the years and made them into me. Meaning, he had made me those things instead of seeing them as just traits that I have and things I have to deal with.
I know there is truth to me being critical. I don't deny it and am working with the Lord on finding the root of that to get it removed. I am in no way minimizing it. I am starting to see that some of it comes from envy and jealousy. We are taking a class on envy and jealousy right now, and alot of it is ringing with me. But, I do believe that David had taken some thoughts, pondered them, and turned them into emotions. He had seen anything and everything that I have said recently as being critical, whether it was or wasn't. The times I was truly critical, he used to enforce his belief that I am just critical all the time. It had grown with him until he just blew his top when I pushed on him to see what was going on.
I can almost visualize it. I believe that the Lord would have shown me the truth of the situation without the fast, but with it, He was able to truly show me the depth of it all. Also, I was able to temper my frustration about it more quickly because He showed me so quickly how it all came about. My flesh was already being fasted into submission, so anger and frustration were easy to simmer down.
After that incident, he was really lovey-dovey toward me and wanted to snuggle and cuddle all the time. He is an affectionate person, but he was being much more affectionate than ever normal. He was doing this because he had just had an emotional release and then felt better and actually more affectionate toward me.
We sat down and talked about everything and I told him some of what the Lord had shown me. (All of it isn't here, of course - some is too private. And some was just for my understanding and not to share with him.) Everything is really good now. Really good, I might add. I love my husband so much!
On a totally different note...
I took a cashier's check by to reinstate our mortgage loan and catch it up to date!!! Wow! God is awesome!
In the lobby of the attorney's office, I sat down next to a couple who started chatting with me. They were there to do the same thing. The gentleman asked me how everything was going and if we were going to be able to save our house. I felt prompted to tell him a bit of our story, so did. He listened quite intently - I'm not sure what was going on in his head - and then told me that he and his wife certainly did believe in the power of prayer. I told him that I believe in the power of prayer, and it's so awesome to see the supernatural power of the Lord working in our lives. That's when he told me they were Jehovah's Witnesses! I don't know all of what they believe, but I don't think it leaves much room for the Lord to supernaturally move in a stay-at-home mom turned Bible college student's life. I know that some seeds were planted. And also, all along, there was another guy listening to our conversation. I love it when God moves.
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